2008-04-07 - 11:56 p.m.

Bon Anniversaire pour moi! Indeed. Six (6) long years and plenty of stubborn steers. Longhorns? Indeed. [You know, if you got paid by the non sequitur, you'd be a rich, rich man - Ed.] Oh hey, Ed! Long time, no edit! And I don't get paid in any sort of currency! Let alone Krugerrands! Hey Ed! Wire me some krugerrands pronto! Don't make me call you from a noisy bar in Avalon, Ed! Actually, that's probably for the best that I don't. I'd probably only end up realizing why twice you ran away.

In the summer of 1981 I was 3 years old. In the summer of 2008 I will be 29 years old (only to turn into a pumpkin/30 at the end of it). Back in '81, Walter Day, founded the arcade Twin Galaxies in Ottumwa, Iowa. He decided to travel around to other arcades (over 100 in a little more than 4 months) to record the top scores of all their games. Eventually, Twin Galaxies blossomed and exploded and became the official score keeper of all video games ever, then, now, in the future and in still undiscovered/disputed zones. They're pretty big wigs in the video gamin' world. Walter Day had Boss Tweed (or some other similar party boss sounding fool) claim that Ottumwa was the "Video game awesome party central capitol of the world". Or some shit. Did any of you ever play Mr. Do's Wild Ride? That game was as sweet as fun dip. Mr. Do was mild. Mr. Do's Castle was hot. Mr. Do's Wild Ride was muy spicy! I loved it.

Also? Ottumwa can suck an egg. (Yes, before you ask, I get most of my insults from Dick Tracy). Because everyone knows Funspot is the King of the World. Topsnuf is going to start a rat fire at Twin Galaxies and then the "Topsnuf Scale" shall be used forever more to measure video game results. Zoo Keeper and Joust supremacy shall be within my grasp!! Or . . . something.

I started writing on this site (which popular culture has decreed is a blog, although in 2002 no one knew the difference between a blog and a belfry) six years ago. Kate convinced me to start writing in one because she was leaving for New Jersey for the summer to become an MTV dance party reality star and wanted me to chronicle all the hi-jinx that were going on back at the Fox Run Mall and all it's neighboring subsidiaries.

Since April 7th, 2002:

- I've lived in 3 1/2 different places. New Meadows, the Rollinsford Business District, and 19Y. (The 1/2 = York)

- I've seen the Red Sox win/sweep the World Series twice.

- I've set my heart up to be broken multiple times by Fox Runneries only to confirm that my heart had been hiding in my backyard all along

- I traveled from the Atlantic to the Pacific

- I returned to Montreal almost 6 years to the day of the Panic Room and Jello

- I experienced the shift of Sachem social circles from motorcycle weekend based tomfoolery and ping pong balls to reception halls and maternity wards

- I've written speeches, memorized passages, documented events, photographed mid-points and end-points, been to more marriages, funerals, christenings, end of summer soirees, vernal equinox celebrations, 30th birthdays, and holiday parties than I can possibly count

- I've lost best friends and reconnected with old friends (some people can fit in both categories). Sadly, or not so sadly, some people can't.

- I've had many a wild and memorable weekend in Brooklyn. Which became the 21 Century's Boston.

- Good Lord, I got my license and have gone through two cars since I started writing in this.

- I joined a gym and go to it regularly (this one probably surprises me the most)

- I came into my own and was forced to realize that no matter how much I love my friends, I need to always take care of myself first, no matter how foreign it may feel.

And now, with the Red Sox coming off their two World Series, and Tim & Jackie due to have twins, and Shan-Y & Aly having their own respective babies in order to marry them off to each other in 20 years, Lost unraveling the last of its mysteries over the next 2 years, Harvey Dent appearing in the new Batman movie, Crystal Skull's being explored on May 22nd, Misha & Niko graduating to grammar school, me doubling 15, we look forward to the future. And you know what? The next 6 years are going to be even better than the last 6! They may not involve as many bug eating, drunken misadventures, yak-yak birds, Jack Bristow day-saving, Kenichi wrestling, Killing Poison, cheesy fries, Ben Folds, boat wax, toothaches, painkillers, tiger-bot Heshes, reality television skewering, secret pizzas, mysterious bruises, reggae booze cruises, bouncy castles, international incidents caused by McLaughlin (oh, who am I fooling? those will never go away) or as many weddings - seriously, the next 6 years can't POSSIBLY involve as many weddings! I've already attended 47 in the last 6 years. We still have a few more weddings on the horizon though. Roy, Andi, Jeff, and then? These next 6 years will be so top scoring on the Topsnuff Scale, I'll be typing entering my initials in everywhere! Children will cry. Widows will weep. Canaries will fly from their coal mines! I told you before and I'll tell you again: I'm back. And this time? I'm playing for keeps. Wait . . . or is it, this time? It's personal. No wait, wait, I think it's, this time? Three's a crowd and a baker's dozen only confuses things. Yeah. That's it.

Hey kids, thanks for reading my dinosaur brain scribblings all these years! It's often comforting to know that Wonky, Janet Cochrane, Kenichi, Spider-Man, Flat Eric isn't the only one I can bounce all my brain waves off of.

It's been real,

Soda Popinski

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