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Farming Out The Synapses - Part 1

2005-07-05 - 10:05 p.m.

Favorite Kayak On The Rack: The black, white, & red lobo

Listening To: Pixies, Gorillaz, Beck, Postal Service

Quote: "I want to know who is responisble for all the butt puke upstairs!" - TC

Well, well. Here were are. A 4th of July double dip. I should say so. We're gonna try to mix things up here. So bear with me. The embers and ashes of the Dover fireworks seem to wafting into my bedroom window. That's right! I said bedroom window! Oh yes my friends. This is going to be a different kind of fundip for this entry of Stuff & Things. For all of you ADD, Tom Cruise hating, vermouth drinking, mole staving, paint sniffing peridots out there who hate slogging through parts of these things that aren't about you [i.e. - Coty being forced to read anything not to do with Armenia, Kate being forced to read anything that doesn't have to do with hamburgers, Kenichi being forced to read anything that doesn't have to do with pulsars], well this is the quick fix for you. Instead of reading all those boring, unfunny things you hate, I've farmed out my thoughts to seperate pockets of cyberspace. And if there's one thing our founding fathers had in mind when they burned the magna charta back in 1776, it was "farming out thoughts to seperate pockets of cyberspace." Or something. "But how will this work?!", you yammer and stammer. Shhhh, Henry. It's a miracle. That's right, we're having a baby. In other words, you already know how it works if you clicked on the link above that said, "bedroom window". And if you didn't . . . well, what the hell are you doing here? Go be like Brooke and Fred and fear the internet and all it's glowing horror.

We didn't take too much of a breather after all that Memorial Day Weekend craziness - both of the wedding and the flip cup variety. That very next weekend, Ben, Peter, and I found ourselves in Clinton, Mass. Which sounds far away, but it's near Fitchburg and Leominster. [Alright class, what's famous about those 2 cities? Give up? Come on - it's easy: Brooke's college roommate Stacey was from the latter and Mad Dog saw Don McLean give a kick ass 4th of July concert in the former when he was a kid. Jeeze, that was such a gimmie.] Anywho, the reason we found ourselves in such a place was TC and Jackie, and the people they were living with, were throwing a White Trash Party.

After all that pork-rindy craziness [what's that? you don't know of any pork-rindy craziness? Kind sir (or madame), you don't seem to be comprehending this whole bit of business. Click the underlined link if you want to know more about a particular topic. God, it's a wonder most of you can pour milk on your cereal unabated. Mmmmmmm. Now I want some Golden Grahams.] I somehow found myself in Laconia for one of my many sojourns of DVD swapping, Alias finale tape watching, Nanny visiting bouts of insanity. This is all on the heels of Memorial Day business mind you. Mind you. It was Monday morning after a later Sunday night than I had planned. I hoped to go to bed early the night before. I had watched the Alias finale with my mother and Don and went to bed shortly after. And that's when Annie called. And the next thing I knew, I was having super crazy heart to heart conversation with Annie where she gave me several helpings of what is known in the business as, "the business". She also expressed alarm over her father recently taking up beekeeping as a hobby. Yeah. Weird. So after a long, but very eye-opening, talk with Annie I finally crashed. The next morning two things of import happened. #1 - I saw that I had an e-mail from Amy. I hadn't heard from Amy since around the same time I started at the Diamond Mines (which is the new name for Danger Mouse as I thought "Danger Mouse" was in danger of getting moused, if you get my meaning . . .) Anyway, Amy informed me that she was in town and I should give her a call. I did. And found out she'd be here (being Lee) from Tahoe (being California) for the following month of June. So that - was sweet. We made plans to meet up later that week. #2 - I decided that I should call Ricky and he and I would do something fun like get pizza and go to Funspot. Which we did both. And no, not at the Braggin' Dragon. Don't be ridiculous. Did our fun get severely limited? You be the judge.

But don't be the Judge Judy. That's so passe. You know what's super not passe though? And very au current? And very hip and hot and hip hot? I shall tell you! Farm livin' that's what! I had a full day that Funspot Monday, boy howdy, did I ever! More full than pizza and video games?! How is that possible? I shall tell you: Getting to go the Shan-Y and Ben Cole's farm for the first time. Truly a glorious farm experience. And now, it shall seem that I am jumping on to the next paragraph. But here's some behind the scenes scoop, a DVD extra for Stuff & Things if you will - it only LOOKS that way, in reality, I've been working on this entry for three fucking days, it's 6:45 in the god damned morning on Wednesday right now, and I'm off to do the Farm write-up before I go try to take another shower adventure in what Dr. FrakenWalden has cobbled together using some mica, fox fur, and flubber. But that said . . . on to the next paragraph! Hooray!

Ok, I've decide that this is gonna be a 2-parter. Because, you know, that last multi-parter worked out soooooo well. Stay tuned for the next episode, which shall include that Pixies concert of yore, more farm talk, the return of Dane Cook, the return of Jimbo (and on the same night!), figs and dates, ending all with your typical 4th of July nuttiness! And some surprises tucked in and around as well! Didn't this seem like a nice short entry? BITE ME.

It's been real,

The Mad Thinker

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