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Boxcar Mentor

2004-09-16 - 10:53 a.m.

Vegas Odds That An Insanity Gene Touches Everyone In My Family: 1:1

Listening To: Van Morrison, The Pretty Things, TH

Quote: "Oh nice! A boob!" - Rex, pointing to the stuffed dog under my shirt

I think I need to get back to running. Peter is shaming me by being out running right now. Without recent birthday girl Becca at the Wallakers to crack the whip I have fallen woefully behind. Hayley is no help since on the few times I even see her she just grumbles about how Aly and my plot to make her do a kegstand is all in vain. Stupid Hayley. But yeah. My "strict" exercise regime has fallen by the wayside a bit. A bit.

Are these fucking NewsRadio DVDs ever going to come out? Well? Are they? Because I want them. And I don't want to wait for them anymore. Why does Mad About Crap Seasons 1 through 18 get to come out on DVD before NewsRadio? Are the parent companies hoping to cash in on the "stupid fucking moron" demographic before the "intelligent wicked awesome cool kids" contingent? If that's their plan, they better rush more of those King of the Hill DVDs into production too! What do you think Greg Edmonds?

- "I say bring on Veronica's Closet!"

Good Lord, if there's one thing I ain't, it's bitter, huh? I think so. I think if I just keep typing then everything will be fine. Did I already mention I want to get Pixies tickets? Did I also already mention that my checks are like super bouncy balls lately so I know not what hidden slush funds I will be using to buy said Pixies tickets? Yeah. I thought so. What do you think Greg Edmonds?

- "I think it's about time the Pixies were recognized for the genius band that they were/are."

Oh Greg! Always jumping on whatever bandwagon Spin magazine has crafted for you aren't you? You crazy ol' nut. Did I mention Real World: Philidelphia? I feel like I did. It's enjoyable. It's nice to have someone in the house like Peter who will watch crap with me. I mean, Ben's good for Simpsons, Family Guy, and a Reno here and there - but other than that, unless it's football or on the History Channel, he no watch. Especially if it's a Bunim/Murray production. And he's hell-bent on not liking/watching Alias. Not that Alias is crap television. Just using it as an example is all. Hey - at least I don't watch Starting Over. That's Peter's secret shame. Or . . . you know - not so secret anymore. What do you think Greg Edmonds?

- "I think you put too much stock in characters on television because you feel you can depend on them more than the people in your real life."

Whoa. Dayum. Ya use a black talk radio superstar from San Francisco as a repetitive gag on an entry and all of a sudden he starts gettin' all high and mighty and jumping into the deep end of the psychoanalyzing pool. Well Mr. Greg Edmonds. You are retired for the foreseeable future. Ryu will fill in for you for the rest of the entry. I want your desk cleaned out by 5 PM. MOUNTAIN TIME!

- "Hot dog! Ryu love Mountain Time! No one ever use it outside Colorado! It feel oh so antiquated!"

Frederick, are you reading this? If so - I've been having a devil of a time getting in touch with you. I've called you like 7 times since my birthday. Call me tonight or something.

Great. Now that I've turned this into my personal bulletin board everyone is gonna start to try to sell their old used Yugo's in my comment section. Hmmmm. That might not be a bad idea. I suppose an old used Yugo is better than the current 2004 Nothing that I'm driving right now. But while I am shouting out - I must ask - (and Titie already warned me that you would have no answer) but Mindy, darling, tell me true - why the need for mayo on the burgers? I mean, no one, NO ONE, not even freak of nature, Ben "I like mustard soap fish candy" Walden, goes into a restaurant and expects mayo on their cheeseburgers! Which isn't to say that no one *likes* mayo on the cheeseburgers, but it should be an additional thing. Like a, "Oh yeah. And slap some mayo on that there square piece o' meat while you're at it!" kind of thing, you know? I shouldn't have to be constantly alert that someone is going to be painting my burger bun with mayo every chance they get. It's outrageous. Wait. What are we talking about again? Oh yeah. Wendy's automatically putting mayo on their cheeseburgers. Outrageous I tell you. You don't see me putting 1,000 Island on the Playmobil without alerting customers do you? Ok. You do. Bad example. I think I need to take a shower. My brain is leaking.

- "American Devil - you so crazy."

I think I need to run away. Where does a 26 year old run away too anyway? I mean, sure, there's boxcars near my house. But I'm too old to be a boxcar child. Maybe I can be a boxcar mentor and teach the kids how to better tie their hobo bags to their sticks and rusty crowbars. Hmmmm. Finally. Some direction. I like it. Damn. I better cut a hole in my shoe and get used to eating dog food. (I don't eat dog food myself, but I hear from sources, that it's good. For feeding dogs.) Kudos to the two of you that get that reference.

It's been real,

Zostoperos

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